It’s raining outside. I sat by the window with a warm cup of tea — feeling a little sad, a little lost.
Some days just begin on the wrong note. And lately, these kinds of days seem to visit more often.
I’ve been through difficult times before — some of the worst phases of my life, actually. But strangely, I never felt as vulnerable back then as I do now.
The so-called mature version of me seems to have disappeared. In her place, I now see a tired, irritable version — a mother who loses her temper too easily.
It’s not the chores, or even my little tornado (my child), that wear me out. It’s something deeper — something inside me that feels… broken.
And every time I try to fix it, I feel like I end up breaking a little more.
So today, I sat with myself — with compassion and gentleness — to just listen.
I realized that sometimes, it’s not what we do that exhausts us.
It’s the weight of unspoken expectations, the quiet loneliness we carry in crowded rooms, and the constant inner dialogue of “what should have been.”
Expectations are cruel like that.
They cloud what’s clearly said. They blur what’s right in front of us.
They convince us that something amazing is just around the corner — and then laugh at us when it isn’t.
They aren’t promises. They’re illusions. And when they break, they make us feel foolish.
So here I am, gently teaching myself to expect less and accept more.
To fear less.
To finally show up for myself.
As the rain pours outside, maybe nature is crying with me — washing something off.
And maybe, just maybe, the sun will rise tomorrow a little warmer, a little softer.
Because looking after ourselves is no one else’s job. It’s ours.
Tell me, do you ever feel like this too?
And what little things in your day make you feel a bit more whole again?
Calm with Me 